If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
