I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
