is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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