I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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