3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
He kissed a someone with a penis
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
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He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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