I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
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