you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
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I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
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I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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