I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize