6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
