I want to have your abortion
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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