Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Randomize
