RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
