Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
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