Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
