thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
