Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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