Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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