Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
