oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
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