I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize