Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
