i think my tv is drunk
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
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