so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
