he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize