I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
