Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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