He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize