Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
