Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
