Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize