But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Dicks are not precious.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
