I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
