She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
