Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
