he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
