Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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