I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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