glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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