we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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