I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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