can we get nightvision for the apartment?
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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