you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
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