i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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