Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
She even gives head with a lisp.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
