My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
