Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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