Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
