And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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