Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
