Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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