It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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